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Mudrunner Oblivion by Simon Mason - May 2010

Because nobody likes chaffing now do they?

Ingredients: pain, sweat, agony, nausea, endurance, exhaustion, commitment, determination. Mix well and burn for 2 hours... Been there, done that, and chuffed to bits to have earned the t-shirt!

Some of the Almost team pose in a carefully selected photo shoot location - Hester Davis, Debbie Bishop, Mike Symonds, Carl Hartley, Craig Hartley, Simon Mason, Fiona Judson and Lee Jones

Set in the beautiful Eastnor Castle Estate this was a 10K cross country race interspersed with physical challenges of strength, endurance and co-ordination. The race started with a steep, straight slog that was deceptively long, with a couple of little flat streaks that really just extend the agony. So up hill number one, and I was in pain, with lungs gasping for air!

It didn't get any better from there. In all, we faced ten "obstacles", spaced across the whole course (about one every kilometre). The first of was reached after crossing a marshland area, where we were met with a series of knee-high mud trenches, and logs that were laid out to block our path which we had to manoeuvre. Completing these, we then moved on to climbing over fences, slithering under cargo nets, swinging across monkey bars, uphill slogs whilst jumping over logs, and squeezing ourselves through cleverly laid out network of rope challenges (it was easy to get tangled up in there). Oh, and last but by no means least, there were two lake swims - but more of that later.

Sometime later, the remainder of the Almost team have also discovered the exclusive selected photo shoot location - Cathy Cotton, Hester Davis, Debbie Bishop, Mike Symonds, Carl Hartley, Craig Hartley, Simon Mason, Fiona Judson, Lee Jones and Liam Smith

The greedy mud - it stole several pairs of trainers!

Shortly after crossing the halfway drinks station, a few of us runners took a 15 minute unplanned de-tour through muddy water (courtesy of a marshal pointing us the wrong direction). In a couple of places it got really deep without warning; at one point it led to me to loosing my footing, and with me up to my neck in mud. It reminded me of the Vicar of Dibley. Fans of the TV series might recall its final episode where Dawn French has a funny moment with puddle of mud.

For those unfamiliar with this scene, I would encourage you to view this short YouTube clip: Vicar of Dibley Puddle.

The dirtiest picture of Craig and his dad Carl that we could show ...

I am still on the receiving end of jokes for that little fall. But I blame the mud. Many people left with good stories that day. I think it was Liam Smith (new to Almost) who said, after the race, that he saw two competitors digging for their shoes in the treacle-like mud!

Fiona and Debbie go for a paddle ... all good clean fun?

I promised that I would return to the water crossings. Before the race I had tried to talk myself into believing that I could do a big finish when I knew the finish line was near and that no matter how tired I was that I would find the strength to push for a sprint finish. Well, let's just say that the water was f-f-f-f-freezing cold, and when your legs are tired and wobbly the cold water makes them want to buckle! Indeed, a few people had to be helped out of the water, suffering from leg cramps. I too found myself struggling - the legs and arms sobbing for mercy - and had trouble getting a grip of the ropes (hands were numb) to pull myself out at the other side! At this point though, with the finish line was in sight, and with only 150 metres to go until the finish line, I was in pain and found myself barely able to move my legs. However, the support from people watching was amazing, and really helped make the dash to the line that little bit easier. So, not quite the sprint finish I had in mind, more like an awkward hobble.

Has Fiona taken up water skiing?

As a relative newcomer, this event was my first in "Almost" colours, and after the support received, it certainly won't be my last. I did this with the help of a few friends, and with fantastic support from other club members (as I went around the course I would often hear people shout for the club), and this was great (thank-you)!

Debbie and Fiona emerge from their paddle

The results:

Craig Hartley 1;33;46 Carl Hartley 1;33;47 Lee Jones 1;33;49 Liam Smith 1;37;47 Simon Mason 1;58;15 Hester Davis 1;59;25 Cathy Cotton 1;59;30 Mike Symonds 1;59;47 Fiona Judson / Debbie Bishop 2;45